You can’t imagine it, the singer states. There she was preparing for her comeback record in eight years, ecstatically in love with her current love, and finally the parent to a young child after facing fertility challenges for ten years, riding high. Suddenly in March she was told she had a breast cancer diagnosis.
The musician, birth name Jessica Cornish, is famous for telling it as it is. The LP, the provocatively titled album, was meant as an candid account, tackling every moment of pain she’d endured since she last made an album (endometriosis, losing a baby, failed relationships, psychological manipulation, suicidal thoughts) with her usual frankness. The lead track, No Secrets, was released in April. But by then there existed a huge secret. The cancer. Later next release, Living My Best Life, was released in May and the artist was talking to press about how she was living her best life, while all the while dealing with her cancer. Four weeks after she went public, and in July she had a mastectomy.
She shoots me her best “What the fuck?” expression. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m doing every media appearance, and they inquire, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I respond, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” she has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s still waiting for follow-up surgery.
We’re at a photo studio in London. She is wearing a beige fake-leather jacket, blue jeans with detailed white appliqués, off-white boots and large glasses. Picture motorcycle style meets 70s singer aesthetic. “I feel like I’m in the seventies and I should have a man with facial hair.” A biker reference, I say, referencing the movie. “That’s what people called me at school!” She beams. She is quick, irreverent and direct. She says she has always been interested in humor and is aiming for her initial standup show next year. “I like entertaining. When performing I frequently joke about the fans.”
Medical Challenges and Discovery
She was getting ready for an performance at the Baftas when she found a lump. “I immediately went to get it examined, had an scan, and they were, like, ‘It looks like nothing; your tissue is healthy.’ And I insisted, ‘Yet I sense it. I have arm pain and tingling in my hands whenever I rise.’ And they replied, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ That was 28 March, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The doctor told her if it was concerning she’d call on the start of the week. By then the singer had assured herself it was fine. The way she explains it, it was inopportune to receive a diagnosis when she had a busy schedule.
“We’re two weeks away from launching this thing after a long hiatus and no new music. And she contacted me and said, ‘Is six okay?’ And I was, like, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I jump on the Zoom expecting it’s all going to be good, and she goes, ‘Please take a seat.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she continues, ‘I’m so, so sorry but your biopsy results have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” What did you say? “I replied, ‘Well, that’s not great. What awful timing.’ My initial thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Men have called me difficult because I’m a strong person who understands who I am
She considered the operation terrifying and absurd. “I fear going under. They lead you. During crises you roll down in a bed, but now I just marched with a medical attire and my bum hanging out. Like a dystopian scene.” But, she notes, she’s been lucky. No chemo, no radiotherapy, just the surgery. “It’s terrible, but you know what? I’m grateful it was caught soon. I had the mastectomy a few months back and my affected breast now appears as a fruit under fabric.” She smiles again. “The nipple was preserved.”
The follow-up procedure is for health and appearance. Her chest, she observes, are now “asymmetrical. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. How rude! I felt, why make it worse, I’m already having a rough time. Such disrespect! Amusingly I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got obsessive tendencies, and I know they’d never be ideal. Illness changed that.”
Previous Struggles
The singer is accustomed to medical issues. She believes her outlook on her diagnosis has been so positive because she’s used to medical emergencies. Frequently they align with peak moments, functioning as a wake-up call, or shock, to remind her not to assume everything is fine. “Honestly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘Things going well? Hold on.’ From a young age, it has often paired with moments of success for me; a major or strange event has happened to my health.”
She recalls to her youth, already starting her career performing in the London theater in a musical (she was cast at the age of nine). That’s when she was diagnosed with the medical problem WPW, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as lightheadedness and palpitations. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an drip, and going back into hospital at night.” She fast-forwards half a dozen years, and teenage Jess has entered the girl group the group while studying at the performing arts school. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was about to put out music in recently I had a car crash and my throat was injured and I was unable to vocalize for a year.”
Hey, I say, wait, I can’t keep up. At just 17? She nods|agrees
